


Reflection

by puerile



Category: Daredevil (TV), The Punisher (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Frank doesn't make an actual appearance - sorry!, Karen realizes things, are they together or not?, tbh this seemed longer on my phone, the world may never know, thought process
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 10:17:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13456164
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puerile/pseuds/puerile
Summary: reflection, noun: serious thought or consideration





	Reflection

Before she lived in Hell’s Kitchen, Karen considered herself a patient and understanding person. Moving didn’t change that, but she found herself becoming more hardened, losing her pushover qualities, and becoming more outspoken. Part of that is from working at the Bulletin, the other is from learning that one of her former bosses stalks around the city at night dressed in red from head to toe. Her heart of gold has gained some tarnishes around the edges, thanks solely to Hell’s Kitchen being the city that it is, but the core is still intact, untouched, and unblemished. She never felt so affected by her heart, however, until danger, violence, and vigilantes became commonplace in her life. 

As shocking as he was, Frank Castle didn’t change her; if Frank Castle did anything to her, he made her morals more resolute and definitive. She doesn’t believe that killing is right, still beating herself up about that man of Fisk’s that she killed, tossing and turning throughout the nights, riddled with flashbacks of blood and the sound of the gun shooting. But it was self defense. She couldn’t believe how easy it was for her to get a concealed carry permit. And how easy she could point a loaded gun at another human being. But it was self defense. 

She never anticipated pointing her gun at Frank, who stood in the doorway of her apartment, stating his innocence in his deep, melodic voice. The same melodic voice that pleaded guilty in court, going completely against the defense’s plan. The same voice that claimed he was already dead. She swore to herself that, no matter what, shooting the colonel was something she would never forgive. She would never forgive Frank Castle. But seeing him standing on the roof while the ship burned changed her. 

Something went off in her heart. He looked nothing short of an atypical guardian angel, nonverbally promising to watch over her as long as they both shall live. Probably even after that. A weird feeling of indecision came with that thought, did she really want to have a man like him in her life? Someone surrounded by turmoil, regret, guilt, and a seemingly insurmountable amount of anger? Karen tried to trick herself into believing that she had no idea why Frank would care about her, but her heart always won out over her head, stronger and more dominant than her mind throughout the majority of her life. 

He said she was safe, that she was never in danger from him because he doesn’t hurt innocent people. But Karen’s been debating how innocent she really is ever since she got involved with Matt, Fisk, and Frank. She knows that she’s no comparison to Frank’s deceased family, a group of three that are as innocent as they come. She owns a gun, has killed a man, triple locks her apartment door and almost boarded up her windows; instead, she opted to keep her blinds drawn indefinitely. But she’s still more innocent than Frank, the avenger that would be rejected from the team, the grieving man trying to vindicate the innocence, picturing his family’s faces on them. Sometimes, Karen pictures his face in the crowd of New Yorkers that surround her on the sidewalks and diners and bars. 

Sometimes she wonders if she’s become paranoid. Always looking around, as if she’s being haunted by the ghost of him. Haunted by the ghosts of maybe’s, what if’s, and potential. She never denied their chemistry to herself, when she’d be at Nelson and Murdock with her head in her hands, hair tangled from bunching it between her fingers in frustration. She would spend that time trying to understand him, thinking that eventually she truly would, but only someone who had gone through the same ordeal as him would truly be able to understand. But that didn’t stop her heart from wanting to be able to be there for him, to wake him from his nightmares, bring him up from his lows and be there when he got down from his highs. Karen knows that she doesn’t actually know Frank Castle; she likes to think that she does, but truly, the only people that really knew the man are six feet down in the dirt. 

That doesn’t scare her though. She’s not petrified that being in his life could bring hers to an end. The pre-Hell’s Kitchen Karen would be appalled by her self confession, perhaps suggest she should attend confession with Matt’s priest, but she never really was religious anyway. Religion can be defined as the system of belief or faith and Karen has faith in Frank, she really believes that he can overcome his past, be better than those trying to bring him down, and bring justice to his family without feeling guilt-ridden for not protecting them as a soldier, a husband, a father. Frank has never failed to protect her, so why would she believe otherwise?

They don’t lie to each other.

**Author's Note:**

> this is just a short little thing I wrote while waiting to get my prescriptions filled at the pharmacy. I've never written Kastle before but I hope this is alright! it's not much, just felt a little spark of creativity and had the chance to type it out on my phone! I'm looking into perhaps writing a multi-chapter (maybe series) on Kastle but I've got a lot of outlining to do beforehand 
> 
> feedback is greatly appreciated!


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